My Heart Aches...She's so grown-up

OK--First of all--3 posts in 3 days! Control yourselves people and don't get used to it. I just have "stuff" finally going on in my sad little life!

DD had her dance pictures last night. The costume is a little "daring" for an 8 year old, but who am I to say so--the dance people love it. But I got her ready and my heart just ached with her beauty. I know we all wonder how it goes by so fast--but REALLY--must she look like she is 13?

She fought me like a banshee when it came time to put on the eye makeup--and I just told her REMEMBER how much this sucks so that in 4 years or so you will not BEG me to plaster this crap on your face every single day. If I was smart, I would have done a video of her having a total meltdown about putting on mascara--I would then run it at night in her bedroom so it slips into her subconscious and she'll never want to wear the stuff.

Anyheeww--an hour of squealing little girls and writing out a check to the photographer that made me want to puke (really--how can they get away with charging that kind of money for dance pics?--for crying out loud, this is not Senior pictures or anything)--we were headed back home--only 3 weeks until the recital and our dance season is over for another year!! YEAH!!! BUt once we got home--the little shit wanted to parade around in her makeup--NO--I DON'T WANT TO TAKE IT OFF. I LOOK PRETTY!! Ugh--and so it begins....

Rob Love.....

Because I love my Twi-hard girls....Enjoy the yumminess....

Swine Flu Crazy--and Dear FAA--WTF???

OK--so some of the little voices in my head are telling me that people are taking this flu thing a little to the extreme. I mean, I understand what they are saying--but if you are sick, get thee to a doctor, get the drugs and go home. Sounds simple non?

BUT--those OTHER little voices creep up and bring to the forefront of my mind that book by Stephen King--THE STAND anyone (where everyone starts dying of the flu--or Captain Tripps)? That book freaked my shit out--and could it be happening?????

I know we have the best healthcare and as Americans in general, we have better nutrition and stuff--so maybe that is why we are not dying like those in Mexico. (Mexico City is about as close to a 3rd world country as you can get without really calling it 3rd world--the filth and poverty I have seen in Mexico is horrible) But I digress--WASH YOUR HANDS AND COVER YOUR MOUTHS PEOPLE!!! Just in case the black crow and the man with the red eyes is about to make his appearance (read the book if you don't get it)

It also brings to mind a Ron White funny: The "threat level" system we have here is very confusing. It scares old people and they do not know what to do. Ron thinks we should only have 2 threat levels: 1) GET A HELMET and 2) PUT THE HELMET ON! I agree--keep it simple!

Along those lines--WHAT IN THE HELL was the FAA thinking and what Ad Agency won a contract to have an image of a fighter jet chasing down a plane in a LOW zone in NEW YORK CITY????? Too soon people, too soon! That was the biggest waste of money I have ever seen and it was in VERY poor taste as well. I mean really? Y'all don't have access to a "green screen"? I have some talented people I work with who could have done that all digitally for you--no waste of fuel and GOVERNMENT (meaning your's and mine) money to do that stupidity! I hope some asses are fired today because of that one. EPIC FAIL people, EPIC. LG shakes head at the FAA people who approved it as well--what morons.

Anyway--those are the thoughts rambling thru my head today!!

OH WAIT--I just found out that the retirement home my 93 year old GRANDMOTHER lives in is on lockdown. Some nutter went over to kill his wife at work today. Did I mention that he is out on bail for trying to do the same thing to her last month????? He hit her with a crowbar and they cannot find him or her in the facility--NICE! I am sure that there will be an old person or 2 that has issues after this. Sunset House is in the hoity toity Ottawa Hills area and is a VERY nice mansion turned into a retirement community--this is NOT going to go over well. What the hell kind of security is going on there? I have to sign away my first born to get in there sometimes--this turkey just strolls in with a CROWBAR in hand (and the news is saying possibly a GUN) and just goes about his business? AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!

I cannot get thru to my Grandmother--I just hope she is down in her room listening to the "Pope on Tape ministry" thingy I got her for CHristmas--maybe she is oblivious to it all happening.....crazy people man


GRANDMA EDIT: Grandma is fine--but the SWAT team was kind of camped outside her window and the ran the lady they rescued right past her window--I got to watch it all happen on TV--GREAT! The guy surrendered--all is well (as can be I guess)

Weather Madness

What the hell is up with the weather today???? In the space of just a couple of hours it had been freezing cold and cloudy, then it hailed, then the sun came out, then it rained, then it hailed again, then the winds howled like the devil and now the sun is partially out again.

Really???????? Mother nature must have a raging case of PMS today.

ENOUGH ALREADY!

Oh--and if you don't like the weather, wait 20 mintues, it will change again. But the good news--it's going to be almost 80 here by the weekend.

Amen Praise Be--Thank ALL the Gods!

Whatever Deity you pray to...and I know some of you have been praying for us..

HUBBY GOT A JOB!!!!!!!!!!!

It has been a long horrible 18 months, and it will stretch out for another 2 until the job begins, but he got the call yesterday that he will be starting in June. He could start next month if he wanted nights, but we did that for 12 years and we can wait a few more weeks for him to be on days again.

Those of you who "know" me realize how hard this has been on us emotionally, spiritually, financially etc...so I thank you for your support. In these times and in this area of the country, getting a job is like hitting the lottery.

He will be working for a very large Solar company--so it's a job buildng for the future--not just a place that who knows if they will be around next year. We are so very blessed right now--and I hate to count chickens before they are hatched, (because he hasn't really started there yet), but this is a great opportunity.

Prayers do get answered....now hopefully business at my job will pick up so we can get back to enjoying all the finer things in life---like electricity, food, health insurance at a reasonable rate.....

I Love Tofu????

OK--so the Colorado DMV had denied a practising Vegan her right to declare her love of Tofu on her car.

The DMV says that the "message" could be interpreted as a sexual reference and had been denied.

Once you see the plate, you will agree...or I am just a big old perv?.....

Today's musings

OK--so I didn't have a great post about Ron White's show....cause really--it wasn't all that great. He was funny yes, but he was SO MUCH funnier last time. Or perhaps it had something to do with my being served a Prime Rib disguised as a BRILLO PAD.

Damn you OUTBACK SNAKE HOUSE! You ruined my night. The bread and salad were good, the drinks slipped down my throat like an elixir, but the Prime Rib? NOT SO VERY PRIME. It should have gone down like Buttah, but it was more like acid tearing at my tender internal organs. Hubby did not enjoy his meal very much either--EPIC FAIL in the food department.


Now my next bit of torture will come tonight as we take DD and 3 of her friends to Chuck E Cheese for some birthday fun. PLEASEFORTHELOVEOFGODSHOOTMENOW!!!!!!!

I will need copious amounts of alcohol to make it thru this night. Help Momma out----Send Vodka!!!

I had the right to remain silent....I did not have the ability

The best line EVER from Ron White!!! Hubby and I are going to see him tonight at the Stranahan! We're going to the 10:30 show because he should be good and drunk by then! We've seen him before and I swear to you, I peed my pants.

Not everyone enjoys his sense of humor, but I get a kick out of him.

Details on his "Behavioral Problems" show to come!

Rob Porn

Thanks to the ladies at "Letters to Rob" for this beautiful picture of my future love slave!!

I'm officially a bitch....wait--I passed bitch a long time ago. I'm SUPERBITOCH

OK--sorry that it's been a while, but nothing is going on in my life so I shan't bore you with trivial things. But seeing as I surpassed bitch and moved right into SUPERBIOTCH, I thought I'd share.

I am a horrible horrible person...why you ask? Well, it's because I will not donate money to a funeral plaque/supper.

Why Amy, you ARE a horrible person you say--well, I guess I am. But first--some background.

Said reciever of "gift" is not my friend. We are together in social settings with other joint friends in my neighborhood. That's it. We don't call each other to chat, we don't hang out at each other's homes. We do the polite "nod and wave" if we are at a function, but no attempt to be other than courteous to each other applies.

Last August, said person had a baby. I was feeling nice and generous back then--I bought the new child a gift and made garlic bread and a dessert for a dinner that was taken to her. I was not invited to her shower, or other gathering for the pending birth, but I still felt like being nice for some reason (no you cannot hold it to me that I can be nice--I'm not nice--I'm a bitch).

Let's see--it's been almost 8 MONTHS since I gave the gift and I have yet to get a verbal or written Thank you. RUDE RUDE RUDE little person. I handed her the gift mind you--not a "drop off"--and she didn't even thank me when taking it from my hand.

I am such a horrible bitch that I even called her on her shit at another group function--about how I saw a birth announcement and thank you card at another mutal friend's home and that did she lose my address? (I live 2 blocks from her mind you--no stamp was even required--she could have stuck it in my door).

She had the NERVE to inform me that she was so busy with the new baby and her husband and her other son--she didn't have TIME (she doesn't work outside the home mind you). I replied that I have a child, a husband a FULL time job outside the home and somehow I still managed to fins time to get her a gift. I then walked away from her and we have not spoken since.

Said person's Grandfather died over the weekend. I found out thru the other friends--who had all received texts and phone calls that he passed. I was not personally informed at all--fine, we're not friends, I'm ok with that. Sorry Grandpa passed--rest in peace dude.

I get an email--sent out to the "friend group" that donations for a supper and gift were to be given to email sender by Tuesday --just give what you always do for things like this and let me know if you can go to the funeral as a show of support for our friend.

RECORD SCRATCH---- WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Excuse me???? I'm freaking floored. I decided to be polite and give a courtesy reply that I would not be contributing at all---so that they would not buy things planning on getting money from me--and no one get's stuck with my portion. I don't feel that I need to be involved in this due to the fact that we are not friends, barely aquaintences AND I'm frankly still pissed that she regards me so little that she cannot even be bothered to thank me for the last gift I sent.

I was sent back an email saying "Thanks for your COURTESY" With Courtesy--being typed in italics, bolded and "quoted". WTF with that ??????

OK--so have I moved into SUPERBIOTCH mode or am I justified??????